Comfort and Character

The quote that has been running through my head this past week is "God is more concerned with your character than your comfort." On my good days I am in total agreement with this statement. Yes God, come and develop my character please. I was just telling a friend the other day how I am more open to constructive criticism than I was when I was younger. I am constantly looking for ways to be a better wife and mom. So I am all about character over comfort until..................my comfort is seriously jeopardized.
Last Friday Jared was laid off from his job. No severance, no unemployment just, "thanks for your time. Good luck." Now one job loss in a family is seriously devastating emotionally, relationally, and financially. But when it happens 5 times in 2 years well it just becomes a tidal wave of problems compounding one on top of the other. The safety net of savings that you are told to build up in case of the worst is not there anymore and you are left wondering the big question, "What are we going to do?" I do not think far ahead on purpose because I know that if I do I will be overcome with fear. So I live just for today. And build up our defenses against Satan who I know is just waiting in the wings with giddy excitement to take advanatge of this whole situation. He is waiting for Jared and I to fight over money and for me to snap at my kids out of frustration. He is just waiting to sink his teeth into us whole heartedly. But you know what? I'm not going to let him. I am saying NO! You can't have this family. You won't make us doubt our God. You won't get the last word.
But that doesn't mean that there won't be days like today where I just feel sad. I am sad that my husband has to go through this again. That his confidence is shaken. It is a hard thing to see the person you love most on this earth suffer. He was just trying to make a good living for his family. He was just trying to make sure I could stay home with our babies. Sometimes it is overwheleming. But we just press on because what else are we going to do? The kids have been our motivators and they don't even know it. Their smiles and laughter are motivating us to stay positive.So we will just wait. Wait on God's perfect timing and continue to have our characters refined by this difficult situation. I have this feeling that I should feel blessed that God has chosen us to endure this hardship yet again. Blessed that He thinks our marriage is worthy enough to take another obstacle on. I have that feeling but to tell you the truth I am not comfortable with that yet. So I will just rest in God's love and continue to have faith. And continue to love my husband and kids the best way I know how. That's all I can do.